What do you want?

What do you want? This is a loaded question.

When I ask my coaching clients this, it's received with silence, almost as if it’s a silly question to ask… But is it?

It's easy for us to reel off what we don’t want.  It's easy to say the big dream things of what we want, but what about the minor stuff.  The day to day, week to week stuff.

So why do you not know what you want?  Well, it comes down to time.  You are so busy running from one task to another, and this is a big question, so it’s easier to push it aside and tell yourself you will come to it later.  It’s not important right now; I have to get the kids to school, answer these emails, or do whatever you are doing.

• But…. If you do not know what you want, how will you see it when it comes to you. 

• If you don’t know what you want, how can you work towards anything.  Doesn’t that mean you follow other people’s ideas, timelines, and desires?

• If you don’t know what you want, how present are you regarding the tasks at hand?

• If you don’t know what you want, how do you know what steps to take? It’s like walking in the dark with no direction.

It’s a bit like knowing you want to climb a mountain but not having a map, a plan or even really which mountain it is… Crazy.

It's ok, though, however. I have your back.  If this has now made you think, what do I want?  Start with Journaling or just writing it down.

What do you want today?  Then what do you want for the week.?  What do you want for this next month and then a year?  Answer those questions first.

Get clear.  Add detail.  Then Visualise it.  It is essential that you write it all down first.  Concrete evidence shows that getting it down on paper makes a huge difference; you can always read it back and reference it if you lose your way a little.

Beware….

A few years ago, I did a 100km walk non-stop.  Every 25km, you had a checkpoint where there was food, water and anything you needed (except the option to prevent the walk..umm). The main thing you were told is “Beware of the Chair” stop for 10 minutes and then keep going; otherwise, your body will start to seize up, your feet feel sore, and your brain will ask, what the hell are you doing?

So I say to you as you ponder the questions what do I want today, this week, this month and year? Beware of shiny materialistic objects.  It's easy to say I want a holiday; I like that new car, I deserve it. This is all true, but what about the holiday and the car you want.  A car is something that gets you from A to B.  Its transport. So is it the feeling of having the car, buying the car, and the freedom to buy whatever car you want?  In which case, connect with what that makes you feel and ask yourself how I can get that feeling today, then the week and the month. 

I hope this is making sense.  What we want is about how do we want to feel?  The bottom line is we are all emotional beings, all searching for fulfilment, and ultimately to feel good about ourselves so we can then help others, be it our family members or the person you meet on the train.

I will end this by saying start with today.  Start with asking yourself:  “How do I want to show up today?”  Then show up that way, and see what happens. Be prepared to be amazed…

Have a wonderful weekend

Amber